I was looking at this rediff report and, if you are the guy who wrote it, you need therapy. Seriously.

First things first, what’s this whole ‘battle’ about? Aamir Khan didn’t enjoy Black, and Mumbai Mirror tells us all about it:

I didn’t like the film. I found it very insensitive, it sends out very wrong signals. It was extremely manipulative. I could see the effort in the manipulation, and the art of the director is in not letting you see the manipulation. Most importantly, it was about a child who had these problems, an alcoholic person comes and says you have to leave her alone with me for forty days, and he slaps her around. I don’t know of any parent who’d agree to that.

Agreed, he has a point. But, Aamir, to be honest, an alcoholic teaching a blind child is a lot more convincing than a terrorist making out with a blind woman in Delhi. You have your take on things, and I have mine. My point is, opinions are like the human rear: everyone has atleast one on offer for the taker.

And that’s where it ought to end. A sane man, or a woman too (just in case this blogger gets bludgeoned for suggesting that women aren’t sane) would simply put the matter to rest and move on with life. No big deal, honestly. The guy who works his butt off all week, sweats bullets at the workplace, earns his daily bread and saves it up for Friday night doesn’t really bother with this ‘battle’.

But, pray tell me, why is rediff doing what I hoped they wouldn’t? Their piece uses terms like ‘battle’ and ‘adversary’, making it sound like they’re at each other’s throats. Hello? A didn’t like B’s flick, and B thinks A’s being dumb. Period.

I thought the writer was trying to be funny. Until I read this bit and did a double-take:

With such industry stalwarts fighting this bitterly, we must ask: whose side do you take? Tell us.

Oh, hell yeah, I mean - we must! How can we possibly go on with our lives without taking sides? Guys, give me a break. This is in all certainty TWI material.

So, a word of advice to my dear folks out there on rediff: think of better ways to increase your ad impressions. This is, with all due respect, lame. Not a lot of respect due there, eh? Tell you what, really, it doesn’t matter. Come December 21, and nearly all the guys who swore by Bachchan will queue up at the box-office for TZP.

- - -

On a lighter note, Mister Bachchan, would you please stop running into issues with the Khans? First SRK, now Aamir, what next, Salman? And then? Why leave the mini-Khans (read: the Fardeens, the Zayeds) or the micro-Khans (read: Jiah - a ‘micro’ if there ever was one)?